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My Black Heart's Worn On My Sleeve
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| *How long has it been?!* |
[23 Aug 2004|10:21pm] |
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music |
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Zepplin |
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My computer exploded. There's the reason for my lack of updates. For those of you that didn't know already, I'm getting married in a week. Yes, little slutty Amber is getting married. I figured it's the right time to settle down and shit and I got a fiance that I love with all my heart. After I get married I will be moveing to Louisianna because that's where his main station is where he gotta work. So everyone better say their goodbye's before I leave because it'll probablly be a while before I see any of you's again. And you better believe that I will be comming back to this shit hole called Buffalo because believe it or not, I'm gonna miss it alot. It's everything that I've grown to know and love. All of my friends, the chill spots, the good times...it's all here in hell. I leave tomorrow to go and pick Jim up. Finally! After 4 months my baby gets to come home with me. We get to start a life together. Nothing can go wrong. This wedding thing is killing me though. It's only me doing anything. I'm paying for it all and planning it all and it's super hard to do all of this on my own. I can see if I had a better paying job. But, that's why I picked up a second job at the fair. That's all over now though, I got my $286 paycheck and flew out of there. And Chuck E Cheese still only pays me $5.65/hour so that's not helping much either. It sucks, ya know? I just had my shower last Saturday. It was pretty decent for just my family showing up. No one from his side came besides his mother and sister and niece. But oh well, right? Mad shit has become missing from my house again and that sucks real bad. My clothes, my shoes, my paraphanalia, my money, my drugs, my smokes, I mean hell, someone even stole my fucking underwear. Who would steal someone else's underwear? That's pretty God damn gross if ya ask me. And then we got all of this drama flying around that I am definitely not gonna write in here because you all know how shit spreads around if someone miss translates what I'm saying. But let's just say that I really need to talk to some people and tell them the truth on how I feel and get ALOT of shit off my chest. I'd be more content with myself then. I could sleep better at night and wake up at peace if I tell some people some shit. Some things that go on make me happy that I'm moveing to Louisianna, but thats the opposite of how I feel. Like, they make me so mad that I can't wait to get out of here and just lose contact with everyone and just start over from scratch. God, I hope that I don't ever lose contact with my friends. Especially Mike, ya know. I mean, he's been there through everything with me. Friends for about 6 years now. I wish that I could take all of my friends down there with me, or that me and Jim could just stay here. If he wasn't in the army do you know how different things would be right now? We probablly wouldn't even be thinking of getting married, we'd still be doing drugs and shit, I wouldn't have had half of the drama I've been through while he's been gone, I don't know, everything would just be so much different, I can't even imagine where our lives would end or even if we'd be together in the long run. But I'm glad the way things are turning out. I can't wait to get married and not have to worry about things most 18 year olds have to worry about. Its like, okay I'm 18, I'm officially an adult now, mind as well start acting like one. You can call me stupid, crazy, a moron, I don't care, I've been called it a million of times. I say 'yeah, I'm getting married' and everyone starts calling me names and telling me how stupid I am, but whatever. You live, you learn, right? If things don't work out (I'm prayin for them too) then I've experienced something some people never get to experience in their lives. It will all work out for the best. But, I probablly won't update for a while because I don't have a computer so everyone call me sometime so we can get together before I leave. (716) 648-8002 I love all of you's and I'm gonna miss everyone so fucking much.
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| *Straight out of line* |
[20 Feb 2003|09:31pm] |
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mood |
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music |
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Anabolic Frolic |
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Happy birthday dear Kurt.
Happy birthday dear Kurt.
Happy birthday dear Kurty <3.
Happy birthday dear Kurt!
<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3
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| *cries* |
[07 Feb 2003|05:24pm] |
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Does ne one wanna lend me 100$???
Ill pay you back i sware to fucking god...ill give you my lunch money every day and my allowance everyday and everything!!!
=/
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| *Fuck yo* |
[28 Jan 2003|01:47pm] |
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mood |
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amused |
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music |
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Missy Elliot ;x |
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MindCrisis66613: ?
Evilsmurfette420: taste it
Evilsmurfette420: its gross
Evilsmurfette420: the orange juice has gone bad
Evilsmurfette420: woop woop
MindCrisis66613: *tastes it*
MindCrisis66613: eeewwwwwwwwwwwww
Evilsmurfette420: no dont
Evilsmurfette420: you might die
Evilsmurfette420: take that needle
Evilsmurfette420: and stuick it in your eye
MindCrisis66613: *gags and pukes all over it*
Evilsmurfette420: you stupid bitch
Evilsmurfette420: i told you no
Evilsmurfette420: you must be
Evilsmurfette420: way into my flow
MindCrisis66613: **dies**
Evilsmurfette420: fuck no
Evilsmurfette420: i wasnt ready for this shit yet
Evilsmurfette420: get yo ass back here
Evilsmurfette420: you owe me money from a bet!
Evilsmurfette420: hold up ima keep thie goin
Evilsmurfette420: dood my beat just keep on flowin
Evilsmurfette420: my bling bling on my neck
Evilsmurfette420: my cash in check
Evilsmurfette420: sounds like a good life, right?
Evilsmurfette420: pass me the blunt and hand me that light
Evilsmurfette420: too much time on my hands?
Evilsmurfette420: shit i think not
Evilsmurfette420: i like all kinds of brands
Evilsmurfette420: fubu, and all the other nigga shit
MindCrisis66613: pimpin vegas outside the sand
MindCrisis66613: s
Evilsmurfette420: all the best sizes fit
Evilsmurfette420: bitch ass no you aint interuptin my flow!
MindCrisis66613: yo mama is a stank ass ho
Evilsmurfette420: ima kick yo ass
MindCrisis66613: then imma cut ya throat wit a piece of glass
Evilsmurfette420: bitch ass hoe i think no
MindCrisis66613: hey my dick!! i think you should blow
Evilsmurfette420: you best not be playa hateibn on the numba one whore
Evilsmurfette420: hatein*
Evilsmurfette420: done yet?
Evilsmurfette420: freestyle now or all hell busts loose
MindCrisis66613: damn bitch, imma bust a cap in yo ass and lay u out on the foor
Evilsmurfette420: hell nah nigga, i think not, yo ass will be on yo kness beggin me fo' mo'
MindCrisis66613: runnin' thru the streets shooin up niggaz wit my magnum 44
Evilsmurfette420: i knock out your teeth and send yo ass walkin thru dat door
MindCrisis66613: damn nigga let us ro' a blunt and remember nevamo'
Evilsmurfette420: yo bitch ass be runnin fast with me left behind with a pocket full of dough
MindCrisis66613: WHAT????
Evilsmurfette420: yo bitch be makein no sense
Evilsmurfette420: gimme dat mike and hop da fence
Evilsmurfette420: get the fuck up hoe
MindCrisis66613: yo yo yo stop
MindCrisis66613: leeme go solo
MindCrisis66613: when i was lil and had no sence
MindCrisis66613: i took a whiz on an lectric fence
MindCrisis66613: it hurt so bad
MindCrisis66613: it shocked my balls
MindCrisis66613: then i took a dump in my overalls
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| *Get Down Tonight* |
[26 Jan 2003|05:32pm] |
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![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) _stare_
...Picture journal. Friends only. Go there n comment and youll be added...
*amber*
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| *Blah blah blah* |
[11 Jan 2003|02:30pm] |
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mood |
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The Streets - Too Much Brandy |
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If ya read my journal n wanna stay added comment...Ima make a cut down in like a week =/
*amber*
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| *Heres a jingle for goldfish* |
[08 Jan 2003|06:43pm] |
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 pissed off |
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Judge Judy =/ |
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Oh my god Ima bomb frontier >=/
I cant drop out...I was born a WEEK too young. Its bullshit...absolute bullshit. I can drop out in June but theres no point in dropping out senior year >=/ Ergh ergh ergh...I hate this shit >=/
*amber*
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| *Words cant bring me down* |
[07 Jan 2003|02:46pm] |
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mood |
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LL Cool J |
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Okay..wanna hear some bullshit?!??!
I take cos...I want to take cos...I cant stand cos...
Today my teacher informed us that we haveta take summer classes this year and next year because they fucked up on scheduleing our 1,000 hours in and when it all even sout in the end were missing about 300 hours and then we haveta pay for their mistakes and go to summer skewl and pay 250 fucking dollars each summer skewl semester...This is fucking bullshit...I dont have the money for this at all. Wait! Theres more! Soo, I haveta take these summer classes which means that they interfere with summer skewl which means i have a 0% chance of graduateing on time so Id have to take highskewl for atleast an extra year and if not that more...if I would to have known this like freshman year then maybe I wouldve tried harder in skewl but because I slacked off for the last 3 years I already haveta take every year of gym again, catch up in math cuz Im in course a er w/e, and theres no chance of me passing english or us history11 this year so all in all...Im fucked...I went to my couselor to see if I could drop cos and she said no!!! She fucking said no!! Ima kill her!! Argh!!
Im dropping out...Im talking to my mom about it when she gets home. I hate this bullshit ;x
*amber*
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| *I hate people* |
[27 Dec 2002|05:50pm] |
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mood |
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hatefull |
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Total Chaos |
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Remember that "asshole" kid that I posted about a while ago?! Well he makes me feel like shit again >=/ I hate him whys he keep IMing me?! Why the fuck does he call me and want me to call him!? I hate him i hate him I hate him !!!!! God fucking damnit!
cold 14136: by the way...
Evilsmurfette420: what
cold 14136: when u came over that night..
Evilsmurfette420: ya
cold 14136: that girl i called was my gf
cold 14136: i KNOW u knew it
Evilsmurfette420: k
cold 14136: but u didn't care
cold 14136: so bye
Evilsmurfette420: i didnt know that but thats lovely
Evilsmurfette420: bye
Am I THAT bad of a person that everyone seems to use the fuck outta me?! Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck...I hate everyone...I hate him expecially Goid damnit !!!!!
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| *merry christmas eveeeee* |
[24 Dec 2002|01:38pm] |
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mood |
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narcissistic |
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music |
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Dead Kennedys |
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I dyed my hair...its black...I look hot ;x
Tomorrow I haveta go to my aunts house and I haveta bring Kristin her Christmas present and send out Lizs...oh man I went insane with these gifts...they dont make ne sense unless your them LOL.
Im bored...I have nothing to do today...I haveta buy more cages cuz my mice are humpin and I dont want a breeding center in my house so I have them in seperate shoe boxes and my sister needs to get her hamster a cage too cuz that thing lives in a tupper ware bowl...errrrmm...
Someone come n visit me today and swift me away to non-boredmn land ;x...please =x
Tra la la la la...I think Ill burn some more cds cuz ya know I jut made like 18 of them ;x
*amber*
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| *whats phish stand for amber?!* |
[11 Dec 2002|07:52pm] |
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high |
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music |
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Phish Lmfao |
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Im stoned and at circut city...jon just brought in music to listen too. Lmao. I <3 pot thats all I haveta say really...I love pot like...A WHOLE LOT!
<3amber
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